If you want to learn a lot about the city you've just moved to, get in a car accident with a policeman. That's what I did, and these are things I've learned in the past few days:
- You learn the locations of Urgent Cares, tow truck lots, and rental car places, and you meet all sorts of cops, and all sorts of locals.
- Rental car companies are not good with renting cars immediately. It flusters them.
- Rental car companies offer different (read: CHEAPER) rates to insurance companies than they offer to individuals. They are also willing to negotiate price. (They also try to tell you such nonsense like, "Minivans are sweet rides." I'll wait 20 hours for another option, thanks.)
- It takes at least 24 hours for the police to submit a police report. And that's if you're lucky enough for the accident to be the fault of an off-duty police officer who was driving his Cop Car.
- If you get hit by said police officer and it was entirely his fault, the city will pay for everything. And be very prompt. And kind. And anxious to please. As in the other party's insurance agent will call you about your claim, at 8.30 am the morning after you leave them a voicemail. And bring you cookies with your final check. To your workplace.
- If said police officer hits you, all his buddies will come by to make fun of him. As will many locals. Everyone has a good laugh about it, really. (Assuming no one got hurt.)
- For example, I now have met 6 police officers of my fair city.
- People in general will ask you if a police officer hit you, laugh when you say yes, and assure you that, "gurrrl, you gone get PAID!"
- There are men who carry around knives that are really closer to being termed "machetes," who have nicknames like "Crocodile" (short for Crocodile Dundee), who will offer their services to poor little women who look more like teenagers. They may even tell you things like, "The police? They around. But me? I'm ALWAYS here. This my area! You need anything, you let me know; I take care of you. You need anything?"
- If police officers offer you a ride home, you take it. And they will let you ride in the front. And maybe look at you a little funny when you tell them you're in that city for seminary. And then proceed to tell you about an article they read about a 20-something woman who recently became a nun. And then agree with you when you say that's a little intense.
- It is a lot easier to give your personal information for the police report if you are not moving into your residence a few weeks later, and thus currently living in a friend's house, neither address of which are your permanent residence on your driver's license (that one being in a different state).
- That whole 'adrenaline/shock from an accident makes you not realize you have pain until a few hours later' thing? That's not a joke. That is legit, my friend. So when they offer you a medic, just say yes.
- There are multiple cultures in a city. Sometimes you even hear three different accents (Asian, Hispanic, then South African) when trying to ask for directions to Urgent Care.
- Don't ask people for directions to Urgent Care. You may not know where it is, but neither do they.
- If you go to Urgent Care, and nothing is actually wrong, they'll still give you a free wrap for your wrist! Yay free stuff!
- Plus, wearing a wrap on your wrist makes you look, and feel, really cool.
- If the X-ray technician asks you if there's any chance you could be pregnant, they won't ask you again in disbelief of your answer if you respond emphatically, "Definitely NOT."
- Living out of your car while you house-sit, because you'd rather not move everything twice--not the most helpful when your car gets towed.
